My final, and possibly my most important lesson was that I will not be able to save all of my students. Prior to student teaching, I had an idealized hope of my classroom. No matter the student, no matter the circumstance, no matter what lengths I had to go to, I will be able to help all of my students. I even went into student teaching with that same mindset. Unfortunately, or possibly fortunately depending on how you look at it, my mindset of “saving all of the children” changed this year.
I was teaching eleventh grade American Literature. This was at the beginning of the semester. I was still getting a feel for all of my students. Who were the over achievers, who were the class clowns, who were the talkative students. I also made it my goal to identify the underachievers, and figure out how to change them. Fortunately, this strategy worked for a couple students. I would bond with the student, and from there it would be easier to work with the student on improving their work ethic. This gave me a tremendous amount of hope that you can help students. It won’t be easy, it will take time, but it can be done. Then I focused my attention on Terrell.
Terrell was a student with Emotional Behavior Disorder. He was notorious for cursing out, and even physically assaulting, both students and teachers. Initially after hearing his intimidating track record, I was very hesitant to intervene. What if he curses me out? What if he assaults me? I was letting my mind run away with all of the possibilities. Eventually, I decided that the pros outweighed the cons. What if I’m the only teacher that tries to reach out to him because of his reputation? I could really make a difference.
Things started off well with Terrell. Surprisingly, we bonded. We had similar experiences in life, which made him a little more open to me and my attempts to improve his work ethic. However, it seems like my words of encouragement went in one ear and out of the other. He was still open to talking to me about things that were going on with him, but he would never attempt to change his behavior in school. I figured that I was making somewhat of a positive impact on Terrell. At least in the time that I started working with him, he had no behavior issues. That was until he threatened and attempted to assault my teacher.
He was of course suspended for his actions. Despite the severity of the situation, I figured that this should not overshadow his progress. He had gone two months without any behavioral issues. That should count for something, shouldn’t it? Unfortunately, shortly after returning back to school from his suspension, Terrell was given another ten days of suspension for skipping school. I was devastated that Terrell had ruined what we both worked so hard on.
I confided in my CT about my feelings. She told me that while she noticed and applauded my efforts, she knew that it was a battle I wasn’t going to win. She told me that it is our natural instincts as teachers to want to reach each student. She continued by saying that while I should try my hardest with all students, I have to learn when I have done all that I can.
Teaching as Storytelling 
Hello! My name is McKenna Cox and I am a student in the Elementary Education Program at Eastern Kentucky University. I really enjoyed your writing piece and I felt a strong connection with it, as it was very relatable to myself. I thought that you had a really good use of emotions through your writing. I have always felt that as a future teacher I will want to be able to save ALL my students and I will not know when to “give-up”. I enjoyed that you included your own personal example, I felt that having a personal example was important for understanding the main idea of the writing. Thank you for this great piece of writing, I think that it is very important for future teachers to read this .
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Hello, I am a Special Education major at Eastern Kentucky University. I think as a future teacher I will go into it thinking the same as you did–that I just want to reach out to each child and make them the best I can. Although that is what all teachers should strive for in every student, I understand that it isn’t always possible to reach some students, no matter how hard you try. I had such a connection with this post because of the student you talked about with EBD. The same things that you worried about (cursing, assaulting) have always been something I have thought about happening to myself as a future teacher. It was good to see the perspective of a teacher on this topic and I can agree with you on many levels. A truly great teacher is one that does his/her best to help all students reach their goals and be successful, even if it doesn’t always follow through the way you hope. Thank you for sharing your story!
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Hello,
My name is Mikayla and I am in my fourth year of studying Elementary Education at Eastern Kentucky University. In my EME 452 course, we have been studying the rhetorical effect author’s use in their pieces to convey meaning to their audience. With your piece, I noticed that you repetitively used phrases like “no matter”, to help us understand that no matter what you did in your classroom, you would not be able to save every student. Also, you repeated “who were” with adjectives that would describe your new class, which helped me understand how you were making connections with your students and how you were going to approach conversations with them. You then took us into your own thoughts by giving us examples of the questions you were asking in your head. This was relatable to me because I ask myself the same questions when approaching a student who may need more than 10 minutes of my time and specific strategies to engage their thinking/behavior. What really kept me reading was your cliff hangers at the end of your paragraphs. I was intrigued to read on to find out what happened after Terrell threatened the teacher. I enjoyed reading your story and it helped me create my own ideas on what I hope to write my own about. Best of luck with your teaching, I hope you save as many students as you can!
Mikayla Matsumura
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